Saturday, February 06, 2010

on my knees

I have been praying a LOT recently. Ever since becoming a Christian, I have prayed daily. Usually many, MANY times a day. I am aware of God's presence all the time, and so I talk to Him all the time. But recently, I barely have words for anyone else. I'm not sure why this is. It's kind of exhausting - like a full time job almost. I'm on Facebook, and I will go through my friends and pray for their needs. I read lots of blogs, and I stop and pray for these families. We're unemployed (yes, again), and I pray for us all the time. I typically pray in the plural now - instead of just praying for my family, I also pray for those around the world who are downsizing, or who have nothing left.

My favorite show, LOST, just started back up, and I caught myself praying for the characters. These are fictional characters, people. How's THAT for crazy?! Once I remembered that, I changed and started to pray for the ACTORS and CREW. Because that didn't seen nearly as nuts.

I had a dream the other day where I was apparently just showing up to heaven. And stretched out in front of me was a group of people, parted down the middle like the Red Sea, welcoming me into eternity. I saw my Mamaw and Papaw first, and some aunts and uncles and friends. But someone else caught my eye. Down at the end, several football fields away, was a bright light, and I knew who that had to be. So I smiled at my family and friends and held up a finger like I was beckoning them to hold on for a sec, and then I sprinted down the aisle toward my Savior. I launched myself into His arms and wrapped myself around Him. and then I was horrified by my behavior and promptly dropped to the ground in awe. I wasn't afraid of Him, just in AWE! It felt so real that when I woke up in my own bed, next to my sweet, snoring husband, I felt a bit jipped. But that day will come, and until then, I am trying to make the most of my time here.

So I pray. and I pray and I pray and I pray. But I want to do more.

I am inspired by two blogs. A lot. If you read the posts that I have listed below, maybe you will catch a glimpse into how I would like to see my life played out. I am a firm believer in "The World Can't Afford your American Dream," but my life doesn't really reflect that. If I were an outsider looking in, I would think that my life was mimicking the American Dream rather than rejecting it. I want to live like Jesus. But I don't. Yet. These two posts help me flesh out what living like Jesus can look like here in America. What my life can look like.

Yes, I am inspired by tangible expressions of love and compassion. And though these two posts deal with the people of Haiti, I see the rest of the world waiting for compassion here too.

And so I pray. and I pray and I pray and I pray. And eventually here, my love and compassion for the world may become a more VERBy extension of the love my Savior shows me.



Don't stop!

Rev Martin Hogan said...

Don't's prayer that keeps the world turning. Keep praying for actors & the film/tv industry, they influence millions for good and I'll.

A Shellbug's World said...

Thank you for posting your blog and all they things that God is showing you. It was really an inspiration to hear how God is working in your life. What ever you do don't stop praying.