Two years ago, I got to drive down to Houston for Thanksgiving to be with my side of the family. My Mamaw was in the hospital, and I was able to spend a good deal of my visit at her side. And every Thanksgiving since, I find myself preoccupied with thanks to God for allowing me to say the things I'd always wanted to say to her. To spend all that time with her. Because it was soon after that she went home to be with her Lord.
I miss her so much. I am a very blessed granddaughter to have had such an amazing set of Grandparents. They modeled for me what unconditional love meant and made it easier to believe that I could receive that kind of love from God. They modeled sacrifice and love and honor and respect. My Mamaw and Papaw were married more than 50 years, and because of that, it is my goal to love my own husband in a way that he'll keep me around for us to celebrate our own 50 + years together. If you're married, you understand that it's not always easy to work through the arguments and disappointments, to not give up and just throw in the towel and believe that you 'deserve' better. I've been there in my own head at times. But I am determined to honor God and to show my husband the love that God wants him to have. For God to teach me all He wants me to learn through sacrificing and compromising and admitting my shortcomings and failures with someone who will support and encourage me through it. All because I first saw that kind of love modeled to me by my grandparents.
This Thanksgiving, I am grateful for so much. God has made my cup overflow. I am praying to know what to do with the excess that keeps collecting at my feet. I want to live simply. I want to share my blessings. I want to love more, learn more, give more, see more. When you have as much as I do, you get real uncomfortable. At least, I do. It just doesn't make sense for me to have all this and for someone else not to. You know? My Mamaw would have given her last drop of blood to someone else if it would have helped. Jesus DID give His all so that I may have what I have.
I have a lot for which to be grateful. And today, I am counting my blessings and praying for those who are going without because I didn't step forward and share enough. Lord, forgive me.