Growing Up

That's it! It's official. My kids are growing up! And it kills me. I want them to stay MINE forever. But they were never really mine to begin with. They are God's. And they are their own person too. I just get the immense pleasure of being around them everyday while they're young. So, like I said, it KILLS me that they are growing up. Because one of these days, they will go on their way and call me when they need money or want to vent. And they'll visit every once in a while, but it won't be the same. I won't be able to sneak into their bedrooms at night and say prayers over their sleeping little heads. I won't be able to make them sandwiches and have them think that I am "THE BEST MOMMY EVER!!" just because I use star shaped cookie cutters to make neat designs out of peanut butter and jelly.

Sigh.

I'm sure every other mommy out there understands this. And this post, if I have my way, will be the one and only time when I express these depressing sentiments. Because from here on out, I will only look at the time I DO have and make the most of it. I will not wallow in self-pity, I will enjoy having my house filled with the sounds of laughter bursting out of their beings when I let them ride on my back as I walk on all-fours across the floor. I will not feel sorry for myself, I will instead make as many star-shaped sandwiches as I can. I will love them as much as I can... and then I will love them some more.

Sigh.